Written by Sam Clark 

Certificate: 12 

Running time: 114 minutes 

Director: Gary Newacheck 

*Sigh* Here we go again. I am beginning to sound like a stuck record every time we found ourselves in this position where a film is brought back to our screens decades later. Without going into strenuous detail as I have done in the past, I shall save you some reading. There seems to be a new wave of nostalgia flooding through Hollywood that they can't seen to get enough of. "Top Gun: Maverick" kickstarted all of this back in 2022 when that proved that old, cherished classics can be resurrected. But that film's unparalleled success was a rare occurrence that not every film will be able to pull off. But does anyone care? Of course not, just do it anyway and hope for that best. And that is where "Happy Gilmore 2" comes in, stamping and spitting on the original for all it's worth.

This comes to us from director Gary Newacheck who comes from TV comedy and who directed Sandler is "Murder Mystery 2" - who has co-written this as well as the last one, make of that what you will. Thirty years after winning the tour championship, "Happy Gilmore" (Adam Sandler) has now retired and is focusing on family life. After a family tragedy (part of me does want to mock just how stupid this plot point is, but in doing so will spoil what has no been shown in the trailer and I don't wish to do that - no matter how much I dislike it), he has taken up drinking and is now a shadow of his former self. His daughter "Vienna" (played Sandler's real life daughter Sunny Sandler - more to come on that) is accepted into ballet school in Paris. The only issue: he cannot afford the tuition. To pay for this, he reluctantly agrees to re enter the golfing world, reconnecting with old and familiar faces from the first in the process. 

Image credit: IMDb / Scott Yamano / Netflix 

It is here that he also encounters "Shooter MeGovin" (Christopher Mcbonald), his hold nemesis and rival. This is where the story completely falls of the rails so bear with me, "Happy" teams up with "McGavin" to form a team of old school, professional golfers (played by real life players Including Rory Meltroy) against a billionaire called "Frank Manatee" (Benny Safdie) who has plans on starting a new technologically advanced golf tournament, "Happy" and others know this will ruin the sport forever, "Frank" has a devious tactic up his sleeve: he has a selection of players who receive special spinal surgery that helps them twist their bodies more so they can hit longer and farther shots. I'm promise I'm not making this up, and the fact that I have to declare that just speaks volumes for me, How will they possible be able to beat them?

I'm am simply going to safe my breath on this one (metaphorically speaking of course), "Happy Gilmore 2" was nothing but a complete embarrassment from start to finish. Right from the beginning, they make a certain choice with a character that proved to me that they are truly scraping the bottom of the barrel, going with whatever avenue they can possibly get. Not only was this moment rushed and brushed over without any sort of lasting impact anyway that was completely underdone (considering said character's importance), but demonstrated to me that the following one hour and fifty five minutes would a slog to endure if this is how we are starting proceedings. The overwhelming sense of desperation could not be ignored.

The plot is laughably atrocious and the cameos just include everyone who has ever appeared in one of Sandler's films - including his wife, which has always been the case (it turns out you can do what you want if you write your own films). I have never seen this many stars and celebrities flood a film since "Entourage" (both the film and the show). Sandler's clearly a popular guy in the business, but that doesn't mean everyone famous individual under the sun should be in your film, let alone one this bad. It will remain a mystery to me how they got the sequel to a cherished and classic 90's comedy this wrong, but as I've said before, we haven't seen the last of it (many more may follow). I brace for what comes up next.

On Netflix now